Welcome to love to listen.
More desire.
More closeness.
More connection.
Sexologist and relationship mentor Sonja Ruess and her team work with individuals and couples on intimacy, desire and the conversations that matter — with science, heart, and a healthy dose of humor.
Who is Sonja
The German voice for honest conversations about sex.
Sonja Ruess is a certified sexologist (ABS), Master Coach, NLP Master and Neuro-Resonance Practitioner (DSA). She founded love to listen in 2022 to bring science-based, shame-free conversations about intimacy into the mainstream.
Her book Der Elefant in deinem Bett ("The Elephant in Your Bed") became a SPIEGEL-Bestseller in early 2026. She has built a community of more than 250,000 followers across Instagram and TikTok, speaks at corporate events and on national TV, and runs a premium relationship-mentoring practice in Ravensburg, Germany.
She leads a team of experts in psychology, sexology, naturopathy and bodywork — because some questions need more than one answer.
The Book
The Elephant
in Your Bed.
The no-nonsense guide to reclaiming desire and intimacy in long-term relationships.
52 honest, witty, science-backed hacks for couples who want their love life back — before they become just roommates. Published in Germany 2026 (SPIEGEL-Bestseller). The English edition is in preparation through our publisher.
For press & media kit: download press kit (PDF)
Reach
A German voice with international resonance.
250K+
Followers across Instagram and TikTok — daily conversations about sex, intimacy and relationships.
SPIEGEL
Bestseller
Der Elefant in deinem Bett — Top-10 in its launch weeks, 2026.
5,000+
Clients accompanied since 2022 in 1:1 mentoring, intensive days and group programs.
Read
Two starting points.
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For couples
When desire fades.
You still love each other. The part where you used to want each other has gone quiet. What's actually happening — and the small moves that bring it back.
Read the article → -
For men
Premature ejaculation.
Not a flaw, a signal. The four mechanisms behind PE and the work that genuinely shifts it — beyond pills and willpower.
Read the article →